Round 1: The United States federal government needs more time

Kevin and I were on Gov while Robbie and Nathaniel were on Opp, and boy did these rounds take two different directions. Kevin and I interpreted the resolution to mean needing more time in order to prepare for the inevitable effects of climate change, which resulted in the plan talking about a gas tax and public transportation. Pretty vanilla, as far as Parli rounds go. Oh, and our judge referred to himself as “left of really left” and “Socialist/Marxist”, so we thought we were in at least the right frame of mind for the judge.

The team Nathaniel and Robbie went against interpreted the resolution to be about time lords. As in from the popular TV series Dr. Who. The government team had a plan about investing in astrophysical research leading to us being able to go back in time so that the U.S. “couldn’t make up history” because we would be seeing it firsthand. They also vaguely included something about forcing people to think more economically. In probably the most appropriate context ever, Nathaniel and Robbie ran topicality. The two gents also ran something about undermining state sovereignty, being that Nathaniel didn’t know what a time lord was and thought it was some sort of new bureaucratic position in the federal government. Apparently, the judge was also extremely interested in Nathaniel’s hiking boots that he wore in lieu of dress shoes, discussing the topic for over ten minutes before and after the round.

– Alex

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